Servias Ministries Blog

Beware of a manipulator!

The Bible does not often use the modern word “manipulation,” but it clearly condemns behaviors that involve controlling, deceiving, flattering, coercing, or exploiting others for selfish purposes.

Moses recorded by The Holy Spirit in Deuteronomy chapter 5:

20 ‘You shall not give false testimony [that is, lie, withhold, or manipulate the Truth] against your neighbor (any person).  AMP

Manipulation often involves deception.  A manipulative person may say one thing while hiding a different motive.  Manipulation uses flattery as well.

Wisdom recorded in Proverbs chapter 29:

5

“A man that flattereth his neighbour spreadeth a net for his feet.”

Flattery is praise given to gain advantage rather than to express sincere encouragement.

Manipulation seeks selfish gain and is usually driven by self-interest; Agape Love seeks the good of others.

Paul wrote by The Holy Spirit in Philippians chapter 2:

3 Be free from pride-filled opinions, for they will only harm your cherished unity. Don’t allow self-promotion to hide in your hearts, but in authentic humility put others first and view others as more important than yourselves.

4 Abandon every display of selfishness. Possess a greater concern for what matters to others instead of your own interests.

5 And consider the example that Jesus, the Anointed One, has set before us. Let His mindset become your motivation.

Manipulation Is Contrary to Truth

Paul also wrote by The Holy Spirit in Ephesians chapter 4:

25 So discard every form of dishonesty and lying so that you will be known as one who always speaks the Truth, for we all belong to one another.

God’s way is openness and Truthfulness, not hidden agendas.

Manipulation Can Be a Form of Control

A striking example is found in the story of Jezebel in 1 Kings 21. When King Ahab wanted Naboth’s vineyard, Jezebel manipulated circumstances, used false witnesses, and orchestrated injustice to obtain what she wanted. Scripture presents this as wickedness.

There is a difference between:

Influence: honestly presenting Truth and allowing others to choose.  Manipulation uses pressure, guilt, fear, deception, or hidden motives to control someone’s choice.

Jesus invited people to follow Him, but He did not manipulate them. For example, when the rich young ruler walked away, Jesus let him choose rather than coercing him (Matthew 19).

Common warning signs of manipulation include:

Guilt-tripping (“If you really cared, you’d do this.”)

Withholding information.

Twisting facts.

Flattery used to gain advantage.

Playing on fear.

Constant pressure to make a decision.

Changing the terms after an agreement is made.

The Biblical model we are to live by:

Truth instead of deception.

Love instead of control.

Integrity instead of hidden motives.

Persuasion through honesty rather than manipulation.

Manipulation is inconsistent with God’s Character because it attempts to control people through deception, pressure, or selfish motives rather than through Truth, Love, and integrity.

Should you do business with a manipulator?

The Bible would counsel great caution when doing business with someone who is known to be manipulative.

A manipulator often relies on:

Half-truths or deception

Hidden motives

Pressure tactics

Constant renegotiation

Exploiting trust for personal gain

These traits undermine the foundation of any good business relationship: trust. 

Wisdom Chooses associates carefully.

Wisdom recorded in Proverbs chapter13:

20 If you want to grow in Wisdom, spend time with the wise. Walk with the wicked and you’ll eventually become just like them.

The people you partner with affect the outcome of your endeavors.

Jesus spoke in Matthew chapter 10:

16 “Be ye therefore wise as serpents, and harmless as doves.”

Jesus did not teach believers to be gullible. We are to be honest and kind, but also discerning.

A person’s character matters.  Remember when your word was your bond?  A trustworthy business partner honors commitments. A manipulator often changes terms when it benefits them.  Avoid being unequally bound.

King David wrote by The Holy Spirit in Psalm chapter 15:

4 “He that sweareth to his own hurt, and changeth not.”

Paul wrote by The Holy Spirit in 2^nd Corinthians chapter 6:

14 Don’t continue to team up with unbelievers in mismatched alliances, for what partnership is there between righteousness and rebellion? Who could mingle light with darkness?

Practical Business Guidance

If someone has demonstrated a pattern of manipulation:

Get everything in writing.

Define terms clearly.

Verify rather than assume.

Avoid handshake agreements alone.

Limit their ability to alter terms later.

Be prepared to walk away.

If manipulation is habitual and severe, the wisest course may be not to enter the business relationship at all.

A Helpful Test

Ask yourself:

“Has this person consistently shown that their word can be trusted when it costs them something?”

If the answer is no, that’s a significant warning sign.

The Bible does not teach that we must avoid all imperfect people—everyone has flaws. But it repeatedly warns against entrusting important matters to those who have a pattern of dishonesty, deceit, or exploitation.

A good rule is:

Grace forgives; wisdom evaluates character.

You can forgive a manipulator and still decide they are not a suitable business partner. In many cases, that’s not a lack of Love—it’s an application of Biblical Wisdom and stewardship.

Whose point of view are you aligning with?

A renewed mind in Scripture is a mind that has been transformed by God’s Truth so that a person increasingly thinks, values, judges, and responds according to God’s will rather than according to the world’s ways or the old sinful nature.

Faith operates out of a greater reality!

Luke recorded by The Holy Spirit in Luke chapter 10:

1 After these things the Lord appointed seventy others also, and sent them two by two before His face into every city and place where He Himself was about to go.

2 Then He said to them, “The harvest truly is great, but the laborers are few; therefore pray the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into His harvest.

3 Go your way; behold, I send you out as lambs among wolves.

4 Carry neither money bag, knapsack, nor sandals; and greet no one along the road.

Jesus wanted them to learn dependence upon God rather than material resources.

5 But whatever house you enter, first say, ‘Peace to this house.’

6 And if a son of peace is there, your peace will rest on it; if not, it will return to you.

7 And remain in the same house, eating and drinking such things as they give, for the laborer is worthy of his wages. Do not go from house to house.

8 Whatever city you enter, and they receive you, eat such things as are set before you.

9 And heal the sick there, and say to them, ‘The Kingdom of God has come near to you.’

10 But whatever city you enter, and they do not receive you, go out into its streets and say,

11 ‘The very dust of your city which clings to us we wipe off against you. Nevertheless know this, that the Kingdom of God has come near you.’

12 But I say to you that it will be more tolerable in that Day for Sodom than for that city.

The disciples had faithfully delivered God’s message and the responsibility for rejecting the Gospel rested on the hearers.

17 Then the seventy returned with joy, saying, “Lord, even the demons are subject to us in Your Name.“

18 And He said to them, “I saw Satan fall like lightning from heaven.

19 Behold, I give you the authority to trample on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy, and nothing shall by any means hurt you.

20 Nevertheless do not rejoice in this, that the spirits are subject to you, but rather rejoice because your names are written in Heaven.”

Jesus teaches that a believer’s greatest joy are not miracles, spiritual gifts, ministry success, authority, or influence. Salvation and Eternal relationship with God should be our greatest joy!

Our focus should not be the fruit produced by our spiritual successes.  Instead, our focus should be centered around our relationship with THE FATHER, The Son, and The Holy Spirit.  We should celebrate the reality that our name is written in His Book.

To summarize, let us compare the difference between GOD’S Point of View versus man’s point of view.

Man’s viewpoint:

• Appearance
• Status
• Wealth
• Education
• Influence

God’s viewpoint:

• Character
• Motives
• Faith
• Obedience
• Humility

God evaluates what is happening inside a person, not merely what is visible.

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God Sees Eternity; Man Sees the Present

We naturally focus on:

• Today’s problems
• Immediate comfort
• Temporary gains

God sees:

• The end from the beginning
• Eternal consequences
• His ultimate purposes

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the LORD.”
— Isaiah 55:8-9

What may seem like a setback to us may be part of God’s larger plan.

God Values Humility; Man Values Exaltation

Human nature seeks:

• Recognition
• Position
• Power
• Self-promotion

Jesus taught:

“For whosoever exalteth himself shall be abased; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted.”
— Luke 14:11

God often chooses:

• Shepherds
• Fishermen
• Widows
• Children

The world tends to overlook those whom God highly values.

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God Values Obedience; Man Values Results

People often ask:

• “Did it work?”
• “Was it successful?”
• “How many people came?”

God asks:

• “Were you faithful?”
• “Did you obey Me?”

For example, Noah preached for decades with little visible response, yet God called him righteous because he obeyed.

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God Sees Spiritual Reality; Man Sees Physical Reality

In 2 Kings 6, Elisha’s servant saw only an enemy army.

Elisha prayed:

“LORD, I pray thee, open his eyes, that he may see.”

The servant then saw heavenly armies surrounding them.

Man’s viewpoint:

• Circumstances
• Problems
• Threats

God’s viewpoint:

• His power
• His promises
• His sovereignty

Faith is learning to see from God’s perspective rather than merely from earthly circumstances.

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God Values Sacrifice; Man Values Possession

The world says:

• Get more.
• Keep more.
• Protect yourself.

Jesus taught:

“It is more blessed to give than to receive.”
— Acts 20:35

God measures wealth differently than people do.

The widow who gave two small coins was praised by Jesus because God saw the sacrifice behind the gift.

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God Values Holiness; Man Often Values Happiness

God certainly cares about our joy, but His highest purpose is to conform believers to Christ.

“Be ye Holy; for I am Holy.”
— 1 Peter 1:16

Man often asks:

• “Will this make me happy?”

God asks:

• “Will this make you more like Christ?”

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The Ultimate Example: The Cross

No event better illustrates God’s perspective versus man’s perspective than the crucifixion of Jesus.

Man’s viewpoint:

• Failure
• Weakness
• Shame
• Defeat

God’s viewpoint:

• Victory
• Redemption
• Justice satisfied
• Salvation accomplished

What looked like the worst day in history became the greatest victory ever won.

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A Practical Question

When facing a decision, it can be helpful to ask:

“Am I viewing this from earth looking up, or from Heaven looking down?”

The believer’s goal is to develop what Scripture calls “the Mind of Christ” (1 Corinthians 2:16)—learning to think about people, circumstances, success, suffering, and Eternity the way God does.

A renewed mind (Romans 12:2) gradually shifts us from man’s perspective to God’s perspective through prayer, Scripture, and obedience.

Let us see as FATHER sees!

Whose point of view are you aligning with?

A renewed mind in Scripture is a mind that has been transformed by God’s Truth so that a person increasingly thinks, values, judges, and responds according to God’s will rather than according to the world’s ways or the old sinful nature.

Faith operates out of a greater reality!

Mark recorded by The Holy Spirit in Mark chapter 4:

37 And a great windstorm arose, and the waves beat into the boat, so that it was already filling.

38 But He was in the stern, asleep on a pillow. And they awoke Him and said to Him, “Teacher, do You not care that we are perishing?”

39 Then He arose and rebuked the wind, and said to the sea, “Peace, be still!” And the wind ceased and there was a great calm.

40 But He said to them, “Why are you so fearful? How is it that you have no faith?“

41 And they feared exceedingly, and said to one another, “Who can this be, that even the wind and the sea obey Him!”

This passage records one of Jesus’ most powerful miracles and teaches profound truths about faith, fear, and the authority of Christ.  Notice that the disciples encountered the storm while obeying Jesus. Following God’s will does not guarantee a storm-free life.

The renewed mind lives with an awareness that sometimes GOD wants to do through you and not for you.  What did Jesus do in this situation?  He slept during a storm.  Jesus was resting because He was completely confident in His Father’s care.  The disciples interpreted His sleep as indifference.

You only have authority over the storm you can sleep in!

The place where you have peace is where you have authority to bring peace.  He spoke over the storm and the chaos outside of Him had to submit to the peace inside of Him.  His internal reality became His external reality.

Jesus spoke in Luke chapter 17:

20 Now when He was asked by the Pharisees when the Kingdom of God would come, He answered them and said, “The Kingdom of God does not come with observation;

21 nor will they say, ‘See here!’ or ‘See there!’ For indeed, the Kingdom of God is within you.“

The external must submit to the Kingdom of GOD.  All Kingdom issues are heart issues, and when heart issues are dealt with, the world around you has to yield itself to your personal internal victory.  The world around you starts to take the shape of the world that is in you. 

The LORD has instructed us to deal with what is going on inside us.  It will position you to redefine the nature of the world around us.

The church frequently gives GOD credit for disaster, saying, “Well that was the Hand of GOD bringing judgment or discipline to people.

The renewed mind looks at obstacles not believing it’s the Hand of THE LORD.  When you see disaster, calamity, or crisis, and believe its from GOD, you lose your ability to discern what is demonic and what is actually from THE LORD.  You have put the devil’s work into the category of GOD’S work.

What are the key lessons to glean from this event?

1. Obedience Does Not Eliminate Storms

The disciples were exactly where Jesus wanted them to be, yet they still encountered danger.

2. Jesus Is Present in Every Storm

Even when He seems silent, He has not abandoned His people.

3. Fear and Faith Compete for the Heart

The disciples focused on the waves rather than the Savior.

4. Jesus Has Authority Over Creation

The wind and sea obeyed Him instantly, revealing His Divine nature.

5. Trials Reveal What We Believe

The storm exposed the disciples’ fears and their need for deeper faith.

Whose point of view are you aligning with?

A renewed mind in Scripture is a mind that has been transformed by God’s Truth so that a person increasingly thinks, values, judges, and responds according to God’s will rather than according to the world’s ways or the old sinful nature.

A renewed mind is sustained repentance. 

Paul wrote by The Holy Spirit in Romans chapter 12:

1 I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, Holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service.

2 And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed (G3445) by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect Will of God.

The Passion Translation provides an enhanced understanding:

1 Beloved friends, what should be our proper response to God’s marvelous mercies? To surrender yourselves to God to be His Sacred, living sacrifices. And live in Holiness, experiencing all that delights His Heart. For this becomes your genuine expression of worship.

2 Stop imitating the ideals and opinions of the culture around you, but be inwardly transformed by the Holy Spirit through a total reformation of how you think. This will empower you to discern God’s will as you live a beautiful life, satisfying and perfect in His Eyes.

Jesus is teaching us about the unseen world.  The unseen world is being used by each of us everyday as we use our cell phones, TV’s, radios, etc.

Paul wrote by The Holy Spirit in 2^nd Corinthians chapter 4:

17 We view our slight, short-lived troubles in the light of Eternity. We see our difficulties as the substance that produces for us an Eternal, weighty glory far beyond all comparison,

18 because we don’t focus our attention on what is seen but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but the unseen realm is Eternal.

What we can’t see is superior in every way.  What we can see is inferior in every way because it is temporary in nature.  The renewed mind lives in that awareness.  Jesus understood this as He would provide us with perfect examples referring to the unseen world.

Mark recorded by The Holy Spirit in Mark chapter 4:

35 On the same day, when evening had come, He said to them, “Let us cross over to the other side.”

36 Now when they had left the multitude, they took Him along in the boat as He was. And other little boats were also with Him.

37 And a great windstorm arose, and the waves beat into the boat, so that it was already filling.

38 But He was in the stern, asleep on a pillow. And they awoke Him and said to Him, “Teacher, do You not care that we are perishing?”

39 Then He arose and rebuked the wind, and said to the sea, “Peace, be still!” And the wind ceased and there was a great calm.

40 But He said to them, “Why are you so fearful? How is it that you have no faith?”

41 And they feared exceedingly, and said to one another, “Who can this be, that even the wind and the sea obey Him!”

To rebuke means to correct, warn, expose, or confront, and this is exactly what Jesus did.  The storm had a demonic source and Jesus discerned the source.  That is why He rebuked the storm and removed the demon’s impact.  The result was smooth seas.

Notice that Jesus had peace as He slept in the storm.  When you are at peace, you can sleep through anything that is trying to evoke fear in your life.  That is another indication of a renewed mind.

Wisdom wrote in Proverbs chapter 23:

1 When you’ve been invited to dine with a very important leader, consider your manners and keep in mind whom you’re with.

2 Be careful to curb your appetite and catch yourself before you fall into the trap of wanting all you see.

3 Don’t crave their delicacies, for they may have another motive in having you sit at their table.

4 Don’t compare yourself to the rich. Surrender your selfish ambition and evaluate them properly.

5 For no sooner do you start counting your wealth than it sprouts wings and flies away like an eagle in the sky—here today, gone tomorrow!

We are to bring thoughts into obedience.

Paul wrote by The Holy Spirit in 2^nd Corinthians chapter 10:

3 For although we live in the natural realm, we don’t wage a military campaign employing human weapons, using manipulation to achieve our aims. Instead, our spiritual weapons are energized with Divine power to effectively dismantle the defenses behind which people hide.

5 We can demolish every deceptive fantasy that opposes God and break through every arrogant attitude that is raised up in defiance of the true knowledge of God. We capture, like prisoners of war, every thought and insist that it bow in obedience to the Anointed One.

This means not every thought that enters your mind should be accepted. A renewed mind evaluates thoughts against God’s Truth.

The mind is renewed through Scripture.

Jesus prayed in John chapter 17:

16 They are not of the world, just as I am not of the world.

17 Sanctify them by Your Truth. Your Word is Truth.

Regular exposure to Scripture reshapes how we think.

Our mind is also renewed through the Holy Spirit.  The Holy Spirit illuminates God’s Word and changes our hearts from within.

The mind is also renewed through obedience.  Renewal is not merely learning information. As we obey what God teaches, our thinking is progressively transformed.

A renewed mind increasingly exhibits:

Humility instead of pride

Faith instead of fear

Gratitude instead of complaining

Purity instead of corruption

Truth instead of deception

Love instead of bitterness

Eternal perspective instead of worldly obsession

A renewed mind does not mean:

Never struggling with temptation

Never having wrong thoughts enter your mind

Becoming intellectually superior

Rather, it means that when wrong thoughts arise, they are recognized and brought under the authority of Christ.

The Ultimate Example:

Jesus Christ perfectly demonstrated a renewed mind. He consistently sought the Father’s will, even when it involved suffering. Believers are called to develop “the mind of Christ” (1 Corinthians 2:16), learning to think and respond as He did.

In practical terms, a renewed mind asks:

“What does God say about this?”

“What response would honor Christ?”

“Am I thinking according to Truth or according to my feelings and the world’s influence?”

The more a believer fills their mind with God’s Word and yields to the Holy Spirit, the more their mind is renewed and their life reflects Christ.

Whose point of view are you aligning with?

A renewed mind in Scripture is a mind that has been transformed by God’s Truth so that a person increasingly thinks, values, judges, and responds according to God’s will rather than according to the world’s ways or the old sinful nature.

Paul wrote by The Holy Spirit in Romans chapter 12:

1 I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, Holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service.

2 And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed (G3445) by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect Will of God.

Strong’s G3339 – metamorphoō means: to change into another form, to transform, to transfigure; a profound inward change that produces an outward difference.

Matthew recorded by The Holy Spirit in Matthew chapter 17:

1 Now after six days Jesus took Peter, James, and John his brother, led them up on a high mountain by themselves;

2 and He was transfigured (G3445)  before them. His Face shone like the sun, and His clothes became as white as the light.

3 And behold, Moses and Elijah appeared to them, talking with Him.

Christ’s appearance was changed and was resplendent with Divine brightness on the mount of transfiguration.  It is the same word Paul used in telling us to be transformed by the renewing of our mind.

What does a renewed mind look like?  We start thinking according to God’s Truth instead of allowing culture, emotions, fear, or personal desires to determine what is true, a renewed mind submits to God’s Word.

For example:

The world says, “Get even.”  Christ says, “Forgive.”

The world says, “Look out for yourself.” Christ says, “Serve others.”

We start seeing Life from God’s Perspective.

A renewed mind begins to view trials as opportunities for growth.  We shouldn’t allow our emotions to prevail when trials come.

We should view our personal resources as stewardship from God, not become hoarders of possessions that will only gather dust or rust.

We should view people as souls created in God’s Image.  Jesus did not look down on people and neither should we.

We should view success as faithfulness rather than merely wealth or status.  After all, wealth can have wings and fly away.

Wisdom wrote in Proverbs chapter 23:

1 When you’ve been invited to dine with a very important leader, consider your manners and keep in mind whom you’re with.

2 Be careful to curb your appetite and catch yourself before you fall into the trap of wanting all you see.

3 Don’t crave their delicacies, for they may have another motive in having you sit at their table.

4 Don’t compare yourself to the rich. Surrender your selfish ambition and evaluate them properly.

5 For no sooner do you start counting your wealth than it sprouts wings and flies away like an eagle in the sky—here today, gone tomorrow!

We are to bring thoughts into obedience.

Point of view is the perspective, position, or vantage point from which a person sees, understands, or describes something.

In everyday life, a person’s point of view is shaped by experiences, beliefs, values, knowledge, and circumstances.

A Biblical worldview seeks to see things from God’s point of view rather than merely a human perspective.

For example:

Humans may see a trial as a disaster.

God may use it to produce faith, perseverance, and Spiritual growth.

This is why Scripture encourages believers to set our affection on things above, not on things on the earth.

Paul wrote by The Holy Spirit in Colossians chapter 3:

1 If then you were raised with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ is, sitting at the Right Hand of God.

2 Set your mind on things above, not on things on the earth.

Simply, point of view is the position or perspective from which someone sees, interprets, or explains something.  One of the goals of a renewed mind is learning to increasingly see life from God’s point of view rather than merely our own.

Jesus dealt with this issue when He spoke in Mark chapter 8:

13 And He left them, and getting into the boat again, departed to the other side.

14 Now the disciples had forgotten to take bread, and they did not have more than one loaf with them in the boat.

15 Then He charged them, saying, “Take heed, beware of the leaven of the Pharisees and the leaven of Herod.”

The Leaven of Herod: Represents a political/humanistic system that may allow for the belief in God, but functions by excluding Him from the practical equations of life.

The Leaven of the Pharisees: Represents a religious system where God is placed at the center of everything, yet He is viewed as impersonal and powerless.

16 And they reasoned among themselves, saying, “It is because we have no bread.” 17 But Jesus, being aware of it, said to them, “Why do you reason because you have no bread? Do you not yet perceive nor understand? Is your heart still hardened?

18 Having eyes, do you not see? And having ears, do you not hear? And do you not remember?

19 When I broke the five loaves for the five thousand, how many baskets full of fragments did you take up?” They said to Him, “Twelve.”

20 “Also, when I broke the seven for the four thousand, how many large baskets full of fragments did you take up?” And they said, “Seven.”

21 So He said to them, “How is it you do not understand?”

Why couldn’t the disciples understand?  The problem was their mindset, their point of view.  They were influenced by the leaven Jesus described.

What are the primary sources that influence your mind?